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Conquering Emotions to Win the Day

Posted By Administration, Wednesday, May 6, 2020

The first half of my life I struggled with my emotions. The second half of my life, I have conquered them.

-Jay Block

I understand it’s not easy. If it were simple, no one would become depressed, overwhelmed, or fearful. And if it were easy, I wouldn’t have been a poor sport when I lost a game of anything the first half of my life. I wouldn’t have thrown golf clubs when I hit bad shots or thrown childish temper tantrums when things didn’t go my way. If it were easy, I would have managed my disappointments to achieve greater results. It’s not so simple, even in the best of times.

The truth is, I was very much aware of my emotional imbalance, and never liked that part of me. I always wanted to become a better person, but I never knew how. I did not need to be punished more. I needed to be taught how to avoid punishment in the first place. All my athletic coaches taught me how to utilize my skills to become a formidable athlete. But they did not teach me how to utilize my mindset to optimize my skill sets and, thus, I consistently underachieved. Until the age of 40. Then it all changed when I met people who taught me how to change me.

So yes, the evolution of CEMP began as a process to fix me. And once I learned and mastered the concepts and strategies, my life has never been the same. My emotions now empower me and no longer embarrass me. Now, almost 30 years later, I have taught these powerful and effective techniques to thousands of job seekers; and to hundreds of résumé writers and career coaches who now incorporate empowerment coaching into their repertoire. Emotional integrity optimizes skill set that result in desired outcomes. Always.

It wasn’t the résumés

When I began writing résumés in 1989, breaking all the so-called rules at the time, I quickly realized it wasn’t the

résumés I wrote that resulted in my clients’ success. It was how they felt about themselves once we had worked together – and once they had résumés they were proud of and confident in. This is what made all the difference.

It didn’t take long for me to realize that the fundamental problem with the entire job search process was that job seekers were not excited, engaged, or confident in the activity. Again I ask the question: how many job seekers have you run across who have told you that they have trouble falling asleep at night because they are so darn excited about waking in the morning to conduct thei

job search?

In the past few years, with a red hot economy and historically low unemployment, job seekers could not get excited about conducting a proactive and inspiring job search for their better futures. And now, with soaring unemployment, business closings, and death all around us, job seekers are even more unglued than ever. Mindset will surely determine skillset – and our destiny.

At this time, please allow me to introduce to you a fellow PARW/CC member. After successfully completing the CEMP program, Cathy Lanzalaco sent me the following – to share with you. At a time of unprecedented anxiety throughout the world... how well we manage our mindset – our thinking – individually and collectively, will surely determine our destiny. And this is no exaggeration.

MAY 2020 | PAGE 11

Empowering our clients to build the lives and the careers of their dreams

by Cathy Lanzalaco
Inspire Careers, Cheektowaga, NY

As a career coach, I have always believed that success starts in the head. Yes, our clients need dynamic and accomplishment-driven résumés, cover letters that garner immediate attention, and LinkedIn profiles that help present their employment and “value” story. But we have all seen job seekers armed with the best tools and strategies struggle and fall short of their aspirations, while others, with average resources, triumphed. Some against all odds, right? So what is the root cause behind both triumph and coming up short? It’s mindset. A positive and empowering mindset, self-talk, and approach with others lead to success. A negative and inhibiting attitude create the opposite.

Coaches by definition are positive, affirming, supportive, and creative. We are forces of nature to be reckoned with as we shepherd our clients on the journey of career exploration and transition. Show me a despondent client recently fired from a job and I will have a list of their shining professional qualifications and top 5 career highlights within 30 minutes. But haven’t you noticed that we, more times than we’d like to admit, believe more in our clients than they do in themselves? As industry professionals, we help them articulate their value to employers and hiring professionals, despite not feeling comfortable or confident talking about themselves or their achievements. Isn’t it true that we are the ones to help celebrate their successes despite their conditioned, hard-wired need to downplay them?

I have always coached my clients from a position of mental strengthening and self-empowerment. And though I knew there was a great, almost universal need for combining job transition skills with a peak performing mindset, I was seeking a program or resource that would help me serve all my clients more fully.

Why I became a CEMP

When I heard Jay Block speak about PARW/CC’s latest certification program - CEMP (Certified Empowerment & Motivational Professional) at last year’s 2019 Conference

in Clearwater Beach, Florida, I was thrilled! This was exactly what I had been wanting to incorporate into my coaching model, to help my clients develop a stronger mindset. This was what our industry needs, specific techniques to help clients conquer the toughest part of job search... their emotional response to fear, rejection, and adversity.

COVID-19: Fear, uncertainty, stress... unemployment

If timing is everything, CEMP couldn’t have come at a better time. The COVID-19 global health pandemic has changed daily life for all of us. While we need to be aware of what is happening around us, to better prepare for what lies ahead and ensure our family’s welfare, it is alarming to me how the media feeds on our fears. We have all seen the numbers: Over 22 million people filed for unemployment last month, and the numbers continue to rise across the nation. Maybe even Depression levels – 25 percent. So many people, including those displaced by the pandemic, are active on social media or glued to their television sets or devices. Consequently, most of us, whether we like it or not, are constantly ingesting negativity regarding the country’s economic downturn and the terrifying forecasts. Yes, we see tons and tons of good will, heart-warming acts of kindness, and feel-good stories. But most people live and breathe economics – personal finances. Our inability to leave our homes is one thing. But our inability to pay the mortgage/rent and monthly bills is quite another thing, entirely. And thus, fear, stress, and a million other negative emotions will sabotage the job search process. As Jay says, everything affects everything else.

When we help equip clients with résumés and job transition tools – along with integrating teachable strategies to successfully manage rejection, setbacks, and other adversities, wow... success is virtually assured! In the pursuit of a new job or workplace opportunity, I believe it is important that we teach clients HOW to see the silver lining - and HOW to turn lemons into lemonade.

Fifteen years in HR

Having worked in human resources for over 15 years, it is been my experience that mentally strong and positive employees are valuable assets to any company. Highly engaged employees are more resilient and resourceful

in times of challenge, change, and crisis. They are more likely to serve as role models and leaders among their peers. Behavioral questions posed during a job interview are meant to draw out how an individual thinks, reacts, and behaves in a given circumstance or event. A coach armed with the resources and actionable insights designed to improve a client’s mental and emotional well-being during an interview (or in any stressful or uncomfortable situation), provides them with a clear and undeniable advantage. To influence a positive decision in their favor.

Why do résumé writers and career coaches need CEMP certification?

In 2018, I became a CPCC which really helped define my value offering to my clients. CEMP builds on the coaching foundation of CPCC which is based on a “whole person theory,” that emphasizes that people are more than their

careers; that we work to love enriched lives. But often times, feelings and conflicting beliefs get in the way of success. In other words, job seekers have not been taught how to successfully ride the emotional roller coaster.

CEMP, including Jay’s 10 principles for success and 16 specific emotional channeling techniques, teaches us how to apply success principles to empower clients to control their own destinies. To enjoy the process. To learn and grow from the journey. Imagine an industry transformation where job seekers actually enjoy, and are engaged in, the process of designing and attaining their better futures. And the best part – it empowers us to live a higher quality life; a richer life... on a consistent basis.

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Diane H. (Director, CPCC) says...
Posted Friday, May 15, 2020
Great examples, thanks, Jay.
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